Six Months

Last week, my brother's friend brought my mom these flowers. Why would such a sweet kid be bringing my mother gorgeous flowers? And why would they make us all cry? Because last week was the six month anniversary of the worst day of my life. The day I lost my baby brother.

Nate was so special. He was smart, funny, extremely talented, and very tender-hearted. Perhaps a little too tender-hearted. He loved music, art, video games, stupid cartoons, and four wheeling. He had his problems, but I remember the last day I saw him alive he was so happy, goofing around and laughing, making us laugh. That's the way I want to remember my brother. Not the boy who thought this world was too hard, that we'd be better off without him.

Please, PLEASE, if you have loved ones in your life who are struggling, reach out to them. If you haven't told them you love them lately, DO IT. Don't get stuck with the same regrets I did. Not a day goes by that I don't think about him, what I could have done differently, what I would say to him. I so wish that my daughter had gotten to know him. I know she'd love him as much as we do. But I will be forever grateful to the Lord for his plan of happiness, for the knowledge that I will see him again, and to my parents who were faithful and true and were sealed in the temple so that our family can never be parted after this life.

I love you baby brother. Until next time.